Tell Me if it's Real
by knowmefirst
Summary: Remus thinks he can be strong, but sometimes strong is not enough when the one you love, hates you beyond reasons.


**Pairing:** Severus/Remus  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 21,315  
><strong>Rating:<strong> M  
><strong>Warning: <strong>Fellatio, rough sex, small angst, AU, a bit oc  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Crescent

**Notes:** Written for **jeannie81** over at hp_sexstars on Livejournal.

* * *

><p>The night was cold and the dense fog penetrated every part of the city making him forget that there were buildings and people around. Sometimes, it made him wonder what could be beyond it, but of course he knew. However, the fog made the mind forget and gave the person a sense of unreality where he could forget that beyond that fog not only was the city, but people could get lost and even killed if they weren't careful. Beyond was a city where some dreams began and others died.<p>

He shivered, rubbing his hands up and down his arms trying to get a little bit of respite from the biting cold. His jacket was thin, and in some places it had holes where the cold entered making him shiver harder. He tightened his arms around himself. He never thought his life would get harder. He thought how it had been before; his life hadn't been perfect, but at least he had had everything he had needed to survive in this unforgivable world. This world where he was another scary monster to little children at night, a monster which the parents could use to scare children into listening.

After Sirius passed away and war came nearer to the front doors of the citizens of the wizarding world, things became harder for him. People who would have given him a days' worth of work before turned him down and closed their doors in his face. His friends couldn't help him as they had their own problems to worry about and he didn't want to bother them. After the war, things hadn't become easier for him. There were no jobs, at least not for him, a werewolf. People were getting back on their feet and rebuilding what was left of the wizarding world.

Without a job, he couldn't keep living in the wizarding world, so he ended up moving to the muggle world. For a few months he had had a job and a place to live. However, he ended up losing his job after the owner was fed up with him missing too many days. Because he couldn't find another job quickly enough he ended up losing his flat too.

He had known hunger and desperation before, but he had always been able to pull himself out of it before he ended up doing something he would regret. This time he not only felt hunger, he felt hopelessness: a hopelessness that was taking him over little by little. He had been living on the streets for some time now. He shivered again as he came out of his musings and looked around. He needed to eat. He been without food for almost three weeks and he was hungry. He was thankful he could drink his fill of water from the parks around him, as that was the only way to keep his stomach full.

However, water wasn't enough anymore. His stomach now growled constantly and water was just not doing it. He hadn't looked through the trash cans for food yet. But he knew it was becoming more of a possibility with each day that passed with no new job and no food. He moved near the wall of the building behind him, to protect his back from the wind that started howling. He pressed himself more tightly against the wall when he felt the first drop of rain. He would do anything to get out of this rain and cold. He wanted to eat and he was tired.

"Come on, get in the car."

Remus looked up and saw a beautiful shining dark grey Porsche in front of him. The driver was leaning over the passenger seat and indicating he should approach. Remus looked around him thinking that maybe the man was gesturing to someone else, but no. He, Remus, was the only one there. He moved forward and leaned down to see the driver. It was a man around fifty years old, with eyes that had a few laugh lines and the little bit he could see of his body, indicated the man took good care of himself. He was dressed in a charcoal suit; the fabric alone showed it must have cost a pretty penny. His hairstyle was an out-of-bed look that instead of looking out-of-place in someone of his age, made him look younger, and he looked nice.

"Yes?"

"Com, get in the car and out of the rain."

"No, thank you."

Remus took a step back from the car and was turning around to walk back to were he had been standing before when the man called him again.

"Then take this" The man reach back to the small space behind the passenger seat of the car and picked up a bag from a fast food restaurant and handed it to him through the car window, "I feel as if you need it more than I do." The man smiled.

"Th—thank you." His stomach growled when the aroma of the food inside reached him.

"Are you sure you don't want a ride? I'll take you anywhere you need to go."

Remus looked at the man again, he looked nice and he had been trying to help Remus without even knowing him. This was the first person since he entered the muggle world who been nice enough to help him out. He looked everywhere but at the man and answered the unspoken question that he knew the man has been wondering, but had been kind enough not to ask.

He cleared his throat and quietly said, "I don't have anywhere to go" tightening his grip on the bag as if the man was intending to take it back.

The man just looked at him quietly and then opened the passenger door making Remus step back or get hit.

"Get in. You can stay with me for tonight."

Remus stood a little bit longer by the sidewalk and thought about his options. Should he get into the car with someone he didn't know? Should he say 'no thank you' and walk away? He looked down at the bag clutched in his hand and decided that it couldn't be worse than what he had been going through. With that thought, he got into the car and closed the door.

"Great, let's go eat. I'm starving" the man said laughing as he drove off. "By the way, my name is Christopher Silcox, Mr.?"

"Lupin, Remus Lupin."

"It's nice to make your acquaintance Remus Lupin."

Remus stared at Christopher from under his lashes as Christopher drove the car. He drove as if he were one with the car. The streetlights illuminated the interior of the car as they drove past. They drove for almost an hour and turned into a road where all the houses were mansions. None of them were one story; all of them had up to three stories and all of them sat like regal kings on their thrones on top of small hills. Their driveways were protected by big impenetrable iron gates that wouldn't be easy to jump if someone ever decided to burglarize the homes. They passed two more houses until they came upon a castle-like mansion. They pulled up to the gate and Christopher rolled down his window and pushed a bottom on a little box.

"Password." Came out a clip feminine voice.

"Vergnügen." Christopher said.

Right after Christopher said the word the gates opened and Remus felt his mouth opening wide when the car drove forward and he got a better view of the mansion. The mansion was made of gray stone and was three stories high, ivy crawled up its side, but the ivy gave the mansion a feeling of warmth instead of looking cold and unapproachable. The car stopped a few feet from the door, as if the occupants knew Chris was outside already, the door opened and a younger man came out. Christopher threw him the keys and the young guy got into the car and drove off.

"That was Andrew; he takes care of the cars." Christopher explained, "Come. I'll show you around. I want you to meet everyone."

Everyone? Remus entered the house behind Christopher and right away he knew this man was rich beyond anything he could ever expect himself to be. Christopher stopped just inside the closed door, removed his coat and threw it over the stair railing. The stairs were another thing that was impressive; they started from the middle and moved upwards to the second and third floor from what he could see from standing at the bottom of them.

It was an impressive workmanship and engineering, as he couldn't see where one stairway began and the other one ended. It looked as if they were made from one sheet of wood. The stairs were a dark, rich mahogany color, which gave the place the classically wealthy look, but without overdoing it. The floors were mahogany wood matching the stairwell; the walls were painted a lovely shade of cream that made the whole place feel masculine and pristine.

"Well, welcome Remus, to my humble home." Christopher said with a smile on his handsome face.

"Umm, thank you." Remus whispered. He never knew that this man's house was going to be so incredible. When he took the offer of a roof, he was expecting something simple. Nothing as incredible as this.

"Now don't be shy. Here, let me take that" Christopher indicated Remus' threadbare coat.

Blushing in embarrassment, Remus removed his old coat and handed it over. He noticed that Christopher didn't even comment; just threw it over his own coat, took him by the arm and guided him to the next room where he pushed Remus down to sit down.

"Now you should meet the rest of the extended family."

Christopher sat down next to him and pressed a button on a table next to the sofa. He leaned back and indicated that Remus should also relax. Not even five minutes from when he pressed the button, people started arriving. There were women and men–all young looking and even Remus could tell that all were beautiful in their own way.

"Here is my family Remus. I will let them introduce themselves and then we eat" Christopher said with enthusiasm and a clap of his hands.

The first person to speak up was a short, dark haired woman who had a pixie look. "Hello. I'm Marlene, but everyone calls me Marley for short."

The next was a blond guy with spiked hair and a ring in his lip. "Sup, I'm Alec, just plain Alec. It isn't short for anything" Alec said, turning and smirking at Marley, who in turn threw a pillow at him.

Christopher whispered next to him, "Those two are constantly fighting, so don't mind them." Remus nodded.

"H—hi I'm Cori" said a quiet voice to his left. Remus turned and saw a guy with lovely, dreamy blue eyes and short red hair, he reminded Remus of a Weasley.

Christopher said, "He's the youngest among us and really shy." Remus smiled at the timid man and received a small smile in return.

"Hey, I'm Andrew. We met already. I'm in charge of the cars here." Andrew had short, military cropped hair, and large, heavily muscled arms and body. Remus really didn't want to get into a fight with this guy on any day with or without magic.

"Hiya, I'm Elizabeth, but for short they call me—"

Her explanation was cut short with the loud growling from Remus stomach. Remus blushed and tried to hide his face. "I—I'm sorry."

"Hey don't worry, we're all hungry here" Alec exclaimed, getting pillows thrown from everyone around.

"Okay I think that's all the introductions for today. Let's go eat." Christopher said standing up from the sofa and indicating that Remus should leave his bag of food behind.

Remus followed them out of the room. They passed an entertainment room, a billiard room, and a room with weird equipment that looked more medieval than anything else. Elizabeth closed this door immediately when she noticed it standing open. They passed by many more rooms all lavishly decorated. By the time, they reached the dining room Remus felt lost and overwhelmed by all he had seen.

The dining room had a long table with a dark cherry finish that could easily seat fifty people. For today it would be seating twenty if Remus had counted the people he had seen correctly. The chairs had black leather covered cushions and backrests with an intricate design which matched the carvings on the table legs.

The table was set with lovely gold-rimmed antique plates with a hint of black, which were accentuated by the black with gold thirteen-inch charger underneath the plates making the whole setting pop out more. The table was formally set–the dinner fork on the left side placed on the center and the dessert spoon and cake fork on the top of the plate. The cutlery was gold. Instead of looking cheap, the overall look of the setting was masculine, just like the rest of the house. He felt as if he were in one of the exclusive clubs for rich society gentlemen.

Christopher indicated that Remus should sit on his right. He would have preferred to shower before joining them at the table as he felt so very dirty and seeing everyone else was clean made him feel worse. Once seated, two people came in from a side door that he hadn't noticed. They were dressed as chefs with one looking to be the head chef by the way he carried himself.

"Remus, let me present Alejandro and his assistant and right hand, James." He pointed at the two chefs, who in turned nodded. "He's the chef in this place. Whatever you do, do not go into the kitchen and try to cook or you'll mostly likely be dead before you finish. That is Alejandro's domain and if you forget, he'll remind you most horribly."

Alejandro glowered at Christopher for this and smacked him behind his head as he passed by. They were served soup to start with. Once Alejandro left, they started eating and the soup tasted incredible. Remus was so hungry, he wanted to throw the spoon to the side and drink straight from the bowl. While the soup was being consumed the table was quiet, but once the soup bowls were replaced by the salad, talking started.

He met the others around him. They were all so happy and talkative, laughing and joking easily, that it made him feel more comfortable. The meal progressed smoothly and he answered a few questions and laughed when Alec made a joke that had half the table squirting water or wine through their noses and getting reproachful looks from Christopher and Marlene.

After the dinner, everyone left with a 'welcome' to Remus. Christopher told Remus to follow him and they walked out of the dining room as the table was cleared. He followed Christopher to the third floor where he saw some of the other occupants that he had recently met. Christopher took him down two halls and opened a door half down the last hall. He walked inside and moved aside so Remus could enter.

The room was beautiful. The four-poster bed was situated in the middle of the room and took half of the space in the room. The windows in the room had black curtains that matched the dark wood paneling behind the bed's headboard. The other walls were white, matching the linens on the bed. The bed had two medium-sized mirrors on either side, which gave extra light and space to the room. The room looked very masculine with small touches of femininity here and there, to soften the masculine feel of the room.

"This will be your room" Christopher turned to look at him, "and through there is the bathroom. Place your clothes in the hamper and when you come out, you'll have clean clothes to wear."

"I thank you so much for your hospitality, Mr. Silcox."

"Call me Christopher, or Chris for short. Everyone around here does."

"Thank you Christopher. I don't know how will I ever repay you." Remus said quietly.

"About that Remus, I would like to offer you a job—"

"I th—"

"Don't say anything or thank me until you hear what the job entails. Get some rest and we will speak about this tomorrow. Good night, Remus." Chris said seriously and quietly.

Chris closed the door as he left, leaving Remus alone with his thoughts. He moved forward and with a trembling hand touched the linens. They were incredibly soft and smelled clean. He was going to sit but decided not to lest he get the linens dirty with his clothes and body. He moved away and with a final look around the room, moved to the door of the bathroom.

He opened it and smiled at the décor. He rather expected this color already. The shower stall was covered with black slate tiles and the door was see-through glass, but this wasn't just a single-person stall! No, it was designed for four people. Instead of the bathroom feeling dark and oppressive, it was lightened by a big picturesque window on the other side of the stall which brought in sunlight making the bathroom feel as if the person taking a shower was a part of nature while still being protected from the elements and still affording some privacy.

Remus removed his clothing and threw them in the hamper. He wanted to throw them away, but then what would he wear when he left tomorrow? He got into the shower and was about to grab the shower faucet when he notice that the shower head was missing. He looked around in confusion, then up to the ceiling and noticed a chrome square tile. He turned the shower faucet and laughed when the water fell as if raining. The feeling was delicious and relaxing.

Remus picked up the shampoo and washed his hair. When he was done, he picked up the soap and washed his body twice, leaving it smelling like a fresh spring morning. He turned off the water with a regretful sigh, opened the door, and picked up one of the white fluffy towels from the towel rack. He moved to the mirror and inspected his body. It wasn't too bad. At least he hadn't lost too much weight. He picked up the bathrobe and put it on before leaving the bathroom. He was about to take it off and crawl into the bed and sleep, when he heard a knock.

"Come in."

The door opened admitting someone who left Remus speechless. This guy was gorgeous; not in a classically handsome way, but in a rough sexy manner. His hair was a classy shoulder length with touches of highlights made by the sun that accentuated his profile. He had facial hair making him look masculine and rough rather than smooth and sophisticated. This guy knew what to do in bed and knew how to bring pleasure to his sex partner. You could just feel it.

"Hello!"

Remus blinked and reddened when he noticed that the guy had been trying to get his attention, "Sorry, yes?"

"I thought I had lost you," The guy smiled and his smile made him look roguish especially with the dimple on his right cheek. "I brought you this change of clothes. Sorry they will be big on you, specially the pants."

"It's fine. Thank you." Remus said and smiled.

"Sorry. Where are my manners? My name is Michael. I just got in so I didn't have a chance to meet you at dinner." Michael extended his hand to shake.

Michael's hand was rough; he could tell just by the touch of his hand that Michael used his hands working for a living, just like another man he had known.

"Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Remus Lupin."

"Hello Remus. It's good to meet you. Well, I'll let you get some rest. Good night."

Michael turned and left, leaving Remus standing alone in the middle of his room. He was turning away when another knock came. The door opened and Michael's head appeared. "Umm, sorry. I forgot to give you the clothes." Michael said embarrassed.

Michael moved inside and handed the clothes to Remus. With another 'good night' Michael moved hastily away bumping into the door frame on his way out. Remus stood there and smiled. He had never known a man—or women for that matter—who acted like that in front of him. He had seen this happen with James and Sirius, but never for him.

With a shake of his head Remus moved without further interruption to the bed, leaving the new clothes by the sofa chair near the bed. He turned off the lamp and got in between the sheet. Once his head touched the pillow and his body felt the softness of the bed, he fell into a dreamless sleep.

The next morning Remus woke refreshed and relaxed. He got up from the bed and stretched. He looked outside the window and moved forward and opened it. He smelled the crisp new day and last night's rain still lingered on the air. He removed the bathrobe in which he had fallen asleep and put on the clothes that Michael had given him. The shirt was white, long-sleeved, and if he wasn't mistaken, made of the finest Egyptian cotton. The trousers were black slacks. They were a little long, but overall the clothes fit well. He was moving to the bathroom when he caught the smell on the shirt.

He raised his arm and inhaled the scent on the sleeve. The shirt smelled of black suede cologne, but under the cologne he could detect the owner's pure masculine smell and he knew in that moment, that the clothes he had on belonged to Michael. He went into the bathroom and moved to the hamper, then remembered that his coat was downstairs hanging over the stair railing and his wand along with it. He couldn't believe he had forgotten his wand and had removed his coat without remembering the wand. Remus felt an urgent need to hide the wand before someone found it.

He found a new toothbrush and in no time finished with his morning routine. With one last look in the mirror, he left the bathroom and his room. Standing outside his room he looked down the hallway and was about to walk on, but then the door opposite his opened and Michael stepped out. They stared at one another and smiled.

"The clothes look good." Michael said.

Remus looked down at himself and nodded, "Yes. Thank you for letting me borrow them."

"You're welcome. So, going to breakfast?"

"Yes I am, but I'm hoping to not get lost." Remus answered.

"Well, I can't let our guest get lost, now can I?" Michael asked laughing.

They walked down the halls, passing more lovely rooms that Remus hadn't seen last night. While walking, Michael told him about the history of the house and the year it was built. Michael told him about how the house had been neglected for over sixty years and the shape it had been in.

"—and then Chris bought it, renovated it, and this is what you see today. Mind you, it took him almost two years to finish, but it was worth all the time and work." Michael finished explaining as they entered the dining room.

They greeted the people already seated. Breakfast this morning was buffet style with eggs, sausages, bacon, fried bread, baked beans, mushrooms, and porridge. Remus took the plate Michael was handing him and served himself. He sat down on one of the many unoccupied chairs and Michael sat down next to him. The breakfast was a more relaxed affair and some were still in pajamas.

Remus was drinking his coffee when Chris walked in follow by Alec, who was wearing his pajamas pants, but nothing else. What made Remus stare was that Alec had both of his nipples pierced and each nipple ring had a diamond.

"I see that you notice the rings." Michael whispered on his side.

"Yeah, it's difficult not to notice." Remus answered as he got back to his breakfast.

"I know what you mean. He's been showing them every chance he gets."

"What are you two talking about?" Chris asked as he sat down on the other side of Remus.

"Alec's nipple rings." They both said at the same time and then laughed.

"Oh. I need to remind him not to come down to breakfast without a shirt. Not everyone wants to see those. I know I don't." Chris said as he started eating.

Remus smiled. He didn't mind the nipple rings, but in his opinion they were in the wrong person's nipples. They would look good in those nipples; he could imagine himself playing with them so badly. The person who those nipple rings should belong to didn't want anything to do with Remus though. Sometimes he wondered if he even existed for that person.

"Remus."

"Yes?"

"I would love to talk to you once you're done with your breakfast." Chris said after awhile.

"I'm finished. Whenever you're ready, we can go."

"Perfect. Let's go." Chris moved his chair back and got up.

They left the dining room together and walked a few doors down. Remus entered the office behind Chris. Chris moved towards a deep, elegant, cherry executive desk and sat behind it in a comfortable leather chair. The chair swiveled as he turned to grab something from the computer desk behind him.

"Okay, let's get to business." Chris pulled out some folders and swirl around, "I'm sorry for keeping you standing. Please, take a seat."

Remus sat down and waited for Chris to start speaking. He knew that this was about the work offer and what it would entail. He waited quietly, watching as Chris hummed over some papers, signed them, then closed the folders, and looked at him.

"Sorry, but if I don't address those papers now, I will end up forgetting them and then I'll never hear the end of it." Chris sighed.

"No problem."

"Okay, I asked you here to speak about the job offer I have for you." Chris steepled his fingers, "I know you have wondered what type of job we do to have all of this." he indicated the whole castle in general, "and that is what I want to speak to you about. This place is a stable—"

"A stable? You mean a place where they keep horses?"

Chris lips twitched, "No, it's a brothel."

Remus stared at Chris with his mouth open, then closed it and opened it again to speak, but when no words came out, he closed it again. He swallowed and tried again. The whole time he was trying to get his jumbled thoughts in order, Chris just stayed quiet and calmly watched him.

"If I do accept it, what would my job entail?" Remus asked after awhile.

"Your job would be to escort the customers wherever they desire and if they pay extra, sex as well."

"Are the rest of them—"

"Escorts?"

Remus nodded, he felt that was all he could do. He stayed in a brothel and no one acted how he expected escorts, prostitutes, to act. They were happy, carefree.

"Yes. They are." Chris moved away from the desk and came around. He sat down on the chair next to Remus. "Look, let me explain how much I would pay you if you accept and the benefits."

Remus nodded.

"If after this, you don't wish to work for me, that's fine Remus. And if you ever need a roof over your head or food you can come here. You will be welcome and you will never be asked to do something you don't wish. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Okay. The house charges the customer according to what they wish, half of the payment goes to you, the other half to the house. The house pays for your boarding, food, and any personal stuff you need. The house will also buy you a car-don't interrupt. All the house asks of you is that you must not take any type of drugs. Are you still with me?"

Remus gave a nod.

"You'll need the car when you need to go to the customer. Some come here, but others prefer for you to go to them. Before I forget, you will also get a cell phone which will be paid by the house. Questions?"

Remus shook his head.

"Okay. I also need to tell you something. Because of the type of business we have going on here, I don't get in trouble by telling you this. We have two type of clientele, one is human and the other is magical. Now the magical are called w—"

"Wizards."

Chris look at him with a raise eyebrow. "Yes, they are called wizards. How do you know that? Aren't you a mu—"

"Muggle. No, I'm a wizard, Chris."

"Well now, then this is easier to explain." Chris smiled. "Half of our clientele are wizards, they are from pureblood and half-blood families; they are influential people that don't want their whereabouts known. Because of this, all the people here take a vow of silence, magic or non-magical."

"So in short, we can't divulge the name of the person we were with to anyone?" Remus stated it as a question, but it was more a confirmation to himself.

"Well, not exactly. You can speak about the person to anyone in the house, but outside the house your vow kicks in."

"Before I say yes or no, you must know something," Remus took a deep breath, "I'm a werewolf."

Remus waited with bated breath for Chris to tell him that he was sorry that he couldn't offer Remus the job. Instead what came out of Chris' mouth surprised him more than anything else could.

"It doesn't matter; you're not the only werewolf in the house."

"What?"

"You're not the only werewolf in the house. You see Alejandro, our chef, is also a werewolf." Christ smiled, "and don't worry about the wolfsbane. The house will pay for the wolfsbane every month."

"Oh." Remus said quietly.

They sat quietly for a few minutes as Remus contemplated his decision. The more he thought about the job the more Remus knew he couldn't find a better offer. Yes, he would be selling his body to people that he didn't know; but he would be getting food and a place to live. He could take days off after the full moon. He knew that this would be a good decision, but he held back. He knew that once he had sex with a client he could never take it back. Remus didn't believe he would have a chance with the man he dreamt about if he took this step. Was he ready to abandon his dream?

He turned to Chris and quietly said, "I accept the job."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am."

"Okay. Then let's gets started with the magical side of the job." Christ pulled a wand from inside his left sleeve, "Where is your wand?"

"I left it in the coat I removed last night."

"Okay, then we need it to be brought here. Jiffy!"

A quiet pop was heard to their left and small elf with a clean red apron that had some initials on the corner was standing waiting for Chris' instructions.

"Remus, I would love for you to meet Jiffy. Jiffy is our head elf; he's the one to thank for keeping the house running smooth." Chris said smiling at the blushing elf.

"Its nice to meet you, Jiffy." Remus nodded towards the elf.

"Its nice to meet you, Mr. Remus Lupin, sir." Jiffy courtesies.

"Please call me Remus."

"Thank you Remus." Jiffy smiled.

"Jiffy could you please bring Remus' coat."

"Yes Chris, I'll get it now."

Jiffy left with a small pop.

"You'll notice something. All the elves call each person by their given name. We encourage them to do so as they are part of this unique family" Chris said. "The only people they call sir or madam are the clients when they come, but only to the wizards."

"Okay, I like that." Remus told him as they heard the tiny pop.

"Chris, here is Remus' coat." Jiffy said.

"Thank you Jiffy. That will be all for now." Chris commented.

"You're welcome" Jiffy said, leaving with a pop.

"Okay. Here's your coat." Chris passed the coat to Remus.

Remus took the coat with a nod of thanks and looked for his wand in the sleeve. When his fingers touched the smoothness of his wand, he gave a sigh of relief and pulled it out, tucking it into his shirtsleeve. He hung the coat over the chair arm.

"Now we move on. You must swear upon your magic not to reveal the names of the customers outside of the house" Chris said seriously.

Remus pulled his wand out, "I, Remus Lupin, vow upon my magic not to reveal the names of the patrons with anyone not of this house." Remus felt his magic sizzle around him as the vow took effect.

"Perfect. Let's move on. The bedroom that you used last night will be your room from now on. If you have any questions and you can't find me, you can ask anyone. Michael's room is across from yours." Chris got up from the chair and moved to his desk. He picked up the laptop from the computer table and brought it to the desk, "Now, I need to order your car and phone. Do you have any specifications as to what type of car you'll like? Or phone for that matter?"

"Umm, I have no idea about either of them." Remus answered sincerely.

"Okay, let me see," Chris started typing fast on his laptop, "I think I'll get you a BlackBerry, as those are better for keeping up with everything you'll be doing. Take it from me; I love mine."

Chris took a phone from his trouser pocket and showed it to Remus. It was a dark silver color and Chris showed Remus that he could also slide it open.

"As for the car, I have found one that I feel goes well with your new image." Chris turned around the computer and showed him a picture.

There on the screen was a beautiful grey mustang, "Is that for me?"

"That means you like it?" Chris chuckled. "Okay, let's order it. The mustang will be here later on today."

"Yes I like it. But I don't know how to drive."

"No problem. Andrew will help you with that." Chris answered as he returned to the computer and clicked away. "I think that would be everything for today. Before I forget, how soon do you want to start?"

"As soon as possible." He said quietly.

"Okay. Is tonight soon enough?" Chris raised an eyebrow.

Tonight? He never thought it was going to be this fast! He knew if he waited he would become more nervous and that could become a problem. "Yes."

"Perfect. Your phone will be here in an hour. I suggest you get acquainted with it. If you need anything, you know how to get in contact with us." Chris looked at him.

"Okay."

"Also don't worry, I'll be giving you one of our regular customer, he—"

"He?" Remus squeaked.

"I'm so sorry, I thought…Umm…Oh damn, I screwed up, didn't I?" Chris said sheepishly.

"Actually you did have it right; it was just a surprise that someone found about it after only a couple of hours of knowing me."

"If you ask me, it's just intuition. If you ask Alec he'll call it gaydar." Chris smiled.

Remus laughed "Okay. What about my customer?"

"Oh, yeah. Well. He likes it if you go to him to…where did I leave that paper?" Chris moved folders off his desk and open a few drawers, "Ha! Here it is."

Remus took the paper that Chris passed him and read the address. It was in a part of London frequented by wizards and witches; maybe it could be a hotel.

"What does he require?" Remus asked quietly looking at the address.

As if he knew what Remus was trying to ask, Chris answered him. "He has already paid for tonight's service. He is one of our most esteemed customers. He likes to talk about everything and anything, so he loves the escort to be knowledgeable. If I'm not mistaken, you'll both hit it off. I do not think he will want anything else besides talk and to play chess. He didn't give me any hints otherwise. If he changes his mind, he'll pay you the extra. Questions?"

"What time should I be there?"

"Oh, yes. I knew I was forgetting something. He requested you to be present before he arrives. So, be there around eight o'clock and be on time."

Remus nodded.

"Find Michael and ask him if you can borrow some clothes. Tell him you'll be meeting 'The Scholar' as that is how he's known to us and Michael will help you choose the perfect outfit for tonight." Chris moved away from the desk and came around and hauled him by his upper arms from the chair. "Don't worry, Remus. You'll do fine. Welcome to the house" and gave him a hug.

"Thank you, Chris. For everything."

"You're welcome. Go find Michael and then relax." Chris shooed him out of the office.

Remus stood outside the door once the door closed and thought about how in such a few short hours his life had changed so drastically. Yesterday he had been standing against a wall and thinking what he would do next and seconds later he had been eating at a table surrounded by strangers who welcomed him with open arms. Now he was an escort/rent boy. He wondered if he could go through with it when the time came to have sex. However, he knew that no matter what came, he couldn't do anything else. There weren't any jobs for werewolves.

Remus moved away from the door and went in search of Michael. He had to stop a few people and ask them about his whereabouts. After a few minutes of wandering he finally found Michael. He was in the exercise room using the rower, pushing back with his legs as his arms rowed while listening to music.

Michael was without a shirt and from Remus' vantage point, he could see the biceps as they moved with each stroke. The muscles on his back and legs strained under the weight. Sweat rolled down his back in rivulets. Remus stood by the door and stared at the play of muscle and imagined how it would feel to touch that back and let the muscles move under his hand.

He came out of his musings. "Michael."

Michael stopped and turned around giving Remus a smile. Michael got up and walked towards a towel that was thrown over the weights to wipe his face and neck, hanging the towel over his neck as he turned around and gave his full attention to Remus.

"Hey, Remus. What can I help you with?"

Michael took a drink from his water bottle and his adam's apple moved up and down as he swallowed. Remus just stood there hypnotized. He took his eyes off Michael and looked around noticing there was one wall made entirely of glass which let the natural light in, illuminating the room; encasing all in the room in light.

"Umm, Chris told me to ask you for a change of clothes for tonight."

Michael looked at him quietly. "So, you have accepted the job?"

"Yes. I don't have anything else" he said sadly.

"Hey, don't worry. You won't regret it. I haven't yet." Michael smiled and winked at him. "So what are you, magical or non-magical?"

"Magical."

"I envy you. I wish I could do magic" Michael said with a sigh.

"It's not all that it's cracked up to be."

"Yeah, I can imagine. So, who are you meeting tonight?"

"Chris called him 'The Scholar'" Remus said smiling.

Michael stopped suddenly, making Remus crush into him, then turned to look at him. "The Scholar? Already?"

"Why? Is there something I should know about him?"

"No, it's just that Chris never sends the rookies to him." Michael continued walking, "He—the client—I mean, is really quiet and he'll ask all sorts of things to see how much you know" Michael shivered. "The last time I was with him I felt more like a student than an escort."

Remus laughed, "Don't worry; he'll be surprised as I know more than people think."

"That's good then." They entered Michael room, "Okay. Now, something for you to wear."

Michael moved toward the closet and opened the door. The closet was a walk-in style. However, this closet was a world of its own–racks upon racks of clothes. Casual, sporty, evening, and some that made Remus want to get closer. He smiled when he noticed a police outfit that was a dark blue color. He couldn't picture Michael in the costume, but he could see why people would ask him to wear one.

Michael noticed were his eyes had been "That outfit I've only worn twice."

Michael turned back to the closet and started taking out shirts, trousers, shoes, coats, socks, and ties. But he noticed that the only thing Michael never pulled out were undershirts. Once done, Michael moved away from the closet and came towards him to show him some of the clothes still on his arms.

"Okay. You'll try this first" Michael passed him black trousers and a black shirt, "and try it with this coat and tie. When you're done, come and show me."

With that, Remus was pushed out of the room and into the hallway. He stood there for a few seconds and then moved to his room. Once inside, he lay the clothes down carefully to avoid wrinkling them and started to undress. It wasn't long before he was fighting with the necktie. He always took twice as much time as he should need to fix the tie the way he liked it. Finally done, he looked in the mirror, but he didn't see anything different from what he had been wearing. Well maybe there was a color change. He was now wearing all black and the only color was the tie, a light gray that went well with the clothes. He knocked on Michael's door.

When Michael opened the door he whistled making Remus blush. "Wow! You look incredible; I don't think we'll need to look further. We found what you'll be wearing tonight."

"Yes, I do feel comfortable. Thank you Michael."

"You're welcome. Now go relax or take a nap."

"Yeah. I think I'll do that." With a final 'thanks' he went to his room.

Remus removed the clothes and hung them in the closet and lay down on the bed. Before he knew it, he was being shaken awake by Chris.

"Hey Remus, it's time for you to get up and get ready for your appointment."

"Okay." He yawned and stretched, "What time is it?"

"It's six-thirty. You have plenty of time to get ready and have something to eat." Chris said as he left the room.

"Thanks." He got up and move to the restroom.

He turned on the water and got in, letting the warm water relax his body after standing under the water for a few seconds. He started washing himself. While washing his body he thought about the client he would be meeting tonight. He wondered how he would look and be. Remus hoped that he wouldn't screw it up. Deep down he knew he was hoping the guy didn't ask for more than talking and playing chess. If he did want more, Remus hoped he didn't freeze up at the last minute.

Turning off the water, he took the towel and dried himself and moved toward the mirror. Remus took his wand and with a wave over his face cleared the day's growth. Once done with that, he opened the mirror as he remembered seeing a cologne bottle. He pulled the cologne out. Sniffing and liking the simple smell, he squirted a tiny amount onto him, enough to leave the client guessing if he could really smell the perfume, but not enough to cause the client a headache. He left the bathroom, put on his coat, and left the room. He was passing through the living room when Chris stopped him.

"Hey Remus, I almost forgot to give you the phone" Chris said as he pulled out a phone from one of his trouser pockets. "I have taken the privilege of saving the phone numbers from some of the other house members. Here, let me show you."

Chris moved closer to him and told him to press number one and Chris' cell phone rang from his trouser pocket.

"My number I save for the number one spot. Number two would be Michael, and three I save for Andrew. If one day, for whatever reason, your car is giving you trouble, call him." Chris moved away, "The rest of the numbers you can save for friends or other people whose numbers you may wish to have handy."

"Thank you Chris. I don't know how to use the phone yet," Remus put away the phone in his inner pocket of his coat, "but knowing that just by a push of a bottom I can get hold of you makes me feel better."

"You're welcome. Before I forget, Andrew will be driving you to your appointment tonight and he'll pick you up, so make sure you call him."

"Why can't I use the floo? It would be easier and less driving back and forth for you guys."

"We don't have the floo connected. Just imagine if we were entertaining a muggle client and a wizard walked out of the fireplace." Chris started laughing.

"Yeah, you're right."

"But don't worry; you'll start your driving lessons tomorrow" Chris said as he looked at the watch. "I'll tell Andrew to get the car ready. It's almost time to go."

"Thanks Chris. I'll just wait outside."

Remus stepped outside and closed the door behind him. He needed this time with himself before facing the night to come. He needed to forget and let the wolf out a bit by embracing the night and its gibbous moon. The wolf was restless as the full moon was almost upon him; but instead of feeling as if he couldn't control the wolf, he felt as if he wanted to let the wolf out more. It was strange; he had never felt like this. Maybe the wolf knew that he would be meeting someone.

He checked the time and noticed that it was twenty-five past seven. The car pulled in front of him. He checked himself one more time and opened the front door, but after a shake of Andrew's head he closed it and opened the back door instead. He got in and once the door closed Andrew drove off.

"Sorry Remus, but I'm your driver so you need to travel in the back instead of in front with me." Andrew explained

Remus nodded, "That's what I suspected when you made me travel in the back seat."

"You do have my number, don't you?"

"Yes. Chris programmed it into my phone" Remus said as he pulled out a cell phone.

"Good. Call me when you're ready for me to pick you up."

Andrew pulled up against a curb and parked, getting out and opening the door for Remus.

"That was fast. I thought we would take longer."

Remus looked up at the building in front of which they had stopped. He had been right; it was a hotel. But not like any hotel he had seen before. This hotel had big windows that when he got closer, realized were actually glass doors to small balconies. The walls were white, but he couldn't see them clearly with all the glass doors. It looked magnificent, and in a corner of the building cover was provided by growing evergreens and other plants that grew in an abundance of color.

"It would have taken longer if the car wasn't magical." Andrew smirked.

"Oh. I was actually expecting a hotel, but something cheap rather than a five star hotel."

"Our clients know that the service we provide is more refined and to a degree, we deserve such accommodation."

"Okay, then I'd better go wait." Remus said nervously.

"Good luck Remus. You'll do fine."

Andrew got into the car and drove off. Remus wished he had the same faith everyone else had in him. However, he didn't and was quite nervous. He thanked the door attendant who had opened the door, moved inside and stared at the interior. It was as grand as the outside, had a modern look to it, and was elegant. He took out the paper that Chris had given him and read what it said. He moved toward hotel reception.

"Hello, and welcome to the Athenaeum Hotel. How may I help you?" The lady smiled politely.

"Hello. I'm here to pick up a key for room 52" Remus said.

"Let me get you that for you sir," She turned to her computer and clicked away. After awhile she pulled a key from a drawer to her right. "Here you go sir. Enjoy your stay."

"Thank you." Remus took the key and strode to the elevators.

Once the door opened he pressed the button for the fifth-floor and rested against the wall while the elevator move upwards. A few seconds later the doors opened and he stepped out, looking for the room number. He found it almost at the end of the hall. He opened the door, stepped inside, and closed the door behind him. He took in the luxury of the room: the bed was queen-sized and the sheets were white with a throw quilt in dark gold.

The headboard was sunset orange which matched the cushions on the chairs by the glass door. The nightstand was birch wood, matching the chairs and the wood on the headboard. The wall behind the headboard was covered from floor to ceiling in mirrors. Overall, every single part of the room matched everything else so well that it brought the room together to create an atmosphere of relaxation. Unfortunately, that is the last thing Remus felt.

He sat down on of the chairs and looked out at the night sky, glanced at his watch, noticing that time had flown by so quickly, that it was five minutes to eight. He was going to start pacing to take away his nervousness when he heard the door open and he froze with his gaze still on the night and the people outside.

Remus heard the door close and the lock click, "My, my how the mighty have fallen."

Remus froze when that silky voice flowed around him and through the glass of the window. He looked behind him and into the midnight eyes of the one and only man for whom he had ever felt something. There, standing a few feet into the room, was none other than Severus Snape dressed in all black muggle clothes.

Remus turned around, got up, and looked at Severus, "Hello Severus."

"I don't remember giving you permission to use my given name, Lupin."

Remus didn't know what to say, where to start, or what to do. So he stayed quiet and let Severus move the conversation and meeting to his liking.

"I was coming here to have a good time and intelligent conversation." Severus took off the coat. "However, I have changed my mind as I don't want to hear your voice."

Severus moved closer and grabbed Remus by the arm, pushing him towards the bed. Remus fell into the bed when he lost his footing.

"I'm more interested in what you're selling. After all, you're a whore, aren't you Lupin?"

"Yes." Remus answered quietly.

Remus wanted to tell Severus that he didn't want it like this, that he had felt something for Severus since they were eleven years old. But when he looked into the midnight eyes full of hatred, he closed his eyes instead.

"Tell me, what can you do?" Severus pulled the turtleneck shirt over his head and let it drop into the floor, "Besides opening your legs and taking it like the whore you are, of course."

Remus felt each hateful word out of Severus mouth cut more and more into his fragile heart making it bleed. He swallowed and looked down into the floor "Anything."

"Anything? So, if I say get on your knees and suck me, you would?" Severus sneered.

Remus nodded, not saying a word.

"Then get down on your knees, whore, and suck me."

Remus swallowed the knot in his throat and move to his knees. He reached trembling hands towards Severus trousers and lowered the zipper. He found that Severus wasn't wearing undergarments and pulled out the semi-hard penis. It was an eight-inch penis with a bulbous purple head. He leaned over to touch the head with his tongue, moving his face closer and took more of the penis into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the head. He felt a hand on his head pushing him to go deeper.

Remus closed his eyes and tried to breathe through his nose as he deep throated for a few seconds until the necessity for air made him pull back. He continued tonguing the cock, making slurping noise as he pulled off the penis for a better angle to take it in. He pressed his tongue to the underside of Severus' cock, making Severus shiver and take hold of his hair a bit tighter. Remus started to bob his head a little faster when he was pulled off. He looked up at Severus waiting for instructions.

"Do not think you could get off that easily, Lupin."

Severus stepped away from Remus and let his trousers drop, moving away from them and the shoes that he toed off. Severus indicated that Remus should get up and move from the floor to the bed. Remus sat down on the edge of the bed, but with a glare and another hand movement from Severus, he scooted towards the middle of the bed sitting down, waiting.

Severus moved towards his coat and took something out, throwing the item on the bed next to his hip. Remus looked down and saw a small potion bottle full of something. He looked up at Severus, who was pointing his wand at Remus and with a swish he found himself naked and his clothes on the floor.

"Turn over as I really don't want to see your face" Severus said snidely.

Remus turned over and knowing what was going to happen, got onto his hands and knees, opening his legs a little wider giving more access to Severus to reach his pucker. He almost jumped when he felt the oil on the outside of his pucker as Severus smeared it over his arse, making him shiver. He bit his lip to hold the moan inside.

The finger pushed inside slowly and then when he relaxed his body, the finger slammed inside, making him close his eyes against the pain of sudden intrusion. Severus pulled the finger out of his body and continued to slam it inside faster making him adjust to the foreign intrusion. He was starting to feel a little bit better and was beginning to enjoy the stimulation when another finger join the first, making him grunt in pain at the sudden change. However, this time Severus didn't go slowly. The fingers inside him started scissoring faster, rotating to loosen him up faster. This time Severus only scissored him for a few second when he inserted the third finger. Remus felt so full, but his body was craving something else; it needed fulfillment.

He wanted to move his hand down, take hold of his cock, and bring himself to completion. The fingers pulled themselves from his now loose opening. Remus looked over his shoulder and saw Severus putting a good amount of oil on his engorged cock and positioning it at Remus' entrance. With one powerful push, Severus seated himself fully, making both of them moan at the intensity of the action.

Remus pushed back to impale himself again when Severus pulled out and made Severus moan. He contracted his inner wall making it tighter for Severus as he withdrew. Remus moaned at the feel of the cock withdrawing slowly and then slamming inside hard. The movements became more erratic with each slam of the hips, as Severus thrust his hips faster, making his testicles slap against Remus inner thigh. Remus felt Severus lean over him to touch his lips to Remus' ear. Remus shivered and contracted his walls around Severus cock without intention, making Severus moan and slam faster even than before.

"I wish the mirror wasn't covered by the headboard. I would have enjoyed watching your face as your body is fucked like a common whore."

Remus froze and closed his eyes. How could he had forgotten that this was merely a customer paying for sexual pleasure. And he was—as Severus constantly reminded him— a whore.

"Oh, don't feel bad. I will pay you" Severus mocked. "After all, you're one of the best fucks I've ever purchased."

Remus felt his cock go flaccid and the intense pleasure he had been feeling evaporate. However, when Severus moved his hips for a different angle, he nudged something inside Remus that made his cock stand up again and made Remus moan. When Severus heard him, he sped up his thrusting, hitting that special place inside and Remus shuddered as he felt his climax nearing.

"Come for me, Lupin" Severus panted into his ear.

With that, his last thread of self-control snapped and Remus threw his head back screaming at the intensity of his orgasm. Remus erupted, coating the sheets under him and clamping around Severus, bringing him along as Severus' orgasm coated his insides. Slamming one more time, Severus pulled out letting him slump into the bed and onto the cum still smearing the sheets.

Remus was about to turn and look at Severus, but the bed moved as Severus got up. He turned and moved away from the wet sheets and looked at Severus as the other man cleaned himself with a few well-placed cleaning charms. Remus stared at Severus as he put on his clothes methodically and sat down on the edge of the bed to tie his shoes.

Once done, Remus watched him walk over to his coat and put it on. Reaching inside the left pocket, he pulled out a small leather pouch and threw it at Remus who caught it by reflex and looked at it and then Severus.

"You're payment, whore."

Remus let the pouch fall onto the bed. He felt dirty. He wanted to wash himself and scrub his body until it was red. He had thought that Severus had a least felt something for him. He now knew it had not meant anything. Severus would never feel anything for him.

He noticed Severus leaving, "Severus."

"Didn't I tell you not to call me by my given name? You do NOT have my permission." Severus swirled around to glare at Remus.

Remus raised his chin wanting to know if Severus felt something for him "Was this only sex for you? I mean—"

Severus laughed mockingly, "The whore wants to know if this meant something for me?"

Remus waited until Severus stopped laughing. He didn't expect Severus to stop so suddenly and walk forward until he was looming over Remus.

With hate in his eyes, Severus said spitefully "Listen well, Lupin. You are nothing to me but a whore that I pay to give me pleasure." Severus leaned even closer and whispered in his ear, "You are nothing but a monster and whore that can never receive love. Haven't you noticed? That's why you are always alone."

Severus pulled away from him, turned around, and left, slamming the door behind him. Remus lay on the bed and pulled the sheets up to cover himself. He felt exposed, cold. Maybe Severus was right and this was all he could ever have of any man. But if Severus wanted only this from him, and this was all he would ever get back, then he would welcome it. He would lock his heart and feelings up; feelings that no one wanted from a werewolf whore.

Remus got up from the bed and with a wince he bent over to pick up his trousers. He quietly dressed and walked out of the hotel, nodding to some of the other people lingering around the lobby. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and pressed number three.

"Andrew." Said a gruff voice.

"Andrew it's Remus. Could you pick me up?" Remus asked quietly.

"Sure, I'll be right there."

Remus closed the phone and put it back inside his pocket and stared up at the night sky. If some silent tears escaped, he didn't take notice. He moved forward when he saw the car turning around a corner and moved to open the door before Andrew could do it.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

Remus was thankful that Andrew didn't comment on the crack in his voice on the single word. They drove the rest of the way in silence. Once they arrived back at the mansion, Remus again got out of the car without waiting for Andrew, and walked to the house. He encountered Chris laughing with Michael and quietly pulled out the pouch and handed it to Chris and moved up the stairs, never noticing Chris and Michael pause to stare at him.

He entered his room and quietly moved towards the bathroom to remove the clothing and dump them in the hamper. He stepped into the shower and turned the water on, letting the hot water hit him full force on his back and neck. He leaned his cross arms on the tile wall. He stood there letting the water get colder. He washed his body without thought, not able to focus on anything except the scene in the hotel.

He turned off the water and stepped out to dry himself, letting the towel drop to the floor. He exited the bathroom, walked towards the bed and lay down, closing his eyes and fell into a restless sleep.

Remus woke up with the sun on his face, stretched, and then winced when he felt the sting on his pucker and groaned when all the muscles he never knew he had, protested against the movement. He didn't remember feeling this tired, not even when he was young and Sirius had come out with the brilliant idea of moving their dormitory beds by hand.

He changed into his own clothing and walked downstairs and into the dining room. Remus looked at the time when he noticed that only Michael was at the table and that he had actually gotten up early instead of late. It was seven o'clock in the morning.

"Good morning, Michael."

"Morning, Remus. Sleep well?" Michael asked over his eggs.

"Yes, thank you. I'm little bit tired this morning, but overall good" Remus lied smoothly as he smiled at Michael.

"Good to hear. I was worried; you didn't look well last night."

Remus winced, "Let's say that I wasn't expecting the person that I met last night."

"You mean the Scholar. Do you know him?" Michael stopped eating and looked at Remus.

"Yes, I know him. We went to school together when we were younger" Remus answered quietly.

Michael stared at him for a few seconds, "That must have been hard. Did you, you know?"

"Yes. That's what he asked for once he recognized me. The only thing we didn't do is speak."

"You know, you don't have to see him if you wish." Michael reassured him.

"That's fine; I'll see him as long as he wants to see me" Remus said with a smile to reassure Michael.

He moved away, got his breakfast, and sat down to eat. They spoke about a few things around the house which Michael wanted to show him how to do. While they were speaking, the rest of the household arrived and sat down around the table, some talking, others quietly eating. Chris again sat down next to him and joined the conversation making them laugh and for a few minutes, Remus forgot about everything that had been on his mind.

After breakfast, he found himself sitting down behind the wheel of his brand new mustang and Andrew in the passenger seat with Michael and Chris in the back seats, as they wanted to join him for his first drive.

An hour later, with many laughs they gave up. Remus had stopped so suddenly after the car finally began moving because Remus had felt he was losing control. Everyone was thrown to the front. Chris and Michael were crushed into the front seats as they hadn't worn their seatbelts. Only Andrew had been wearing a seatbelt, so Andrew was the only one who experienced a seatbelt burn.

After that, Michael and Alec helped him get the hang of his phone, another great laugh. Remus ended up sending blank text messages to many of the people around the house before finally catching on to all the phone's quirks. The day sped past with many laughs and texts back and forth between the people around the house until Remus had the hang of the phone.

Remus was leaning against the headboard and reading a book that he had found in the library when his phone fell through the small crack between the headboard and mattress. He tried to grab it before the phone fell to the floor, but ended up pushing it through instead, making it fall with a crash. He cursed and got off the bed, leaning down to see his phone on the floor by the headboard and the battery that had flown off lying down by the right leg of the bed. At least he could reach the battery easily.

Remus crawled down and was trying to reach the phone without needing to get all the way beneath the bed. Of course that was impossible, so he ended up under the bed with his ass in the air, when he heard a knock at his door.

"Come in" Remus called out.

"Hey Remus, may I have a…" Total silence. "What are you doing?" Chris finally asked.

Remus wriggled out from under the bed hitting his head in the process and cursing, "Sorry, my phone slipped and fell under the bed. I was trying to retrieve it."

Remus rubbed the bump on his head, put the phone and battery in his pocket, and turned to Chris indicating that he should continue.

"Yes, I came to speak to you." Chris motioned, questioning if he could sit.

Remus nodded. "Sure, what do you wish to speak about?"

"You have another customer tonight. I was wondering if you're up for it."

"Who is it?" Remus asked, sitting down on the bed.

"He's new, however he's been cleared. So it's good to go...if you accept."

"Yes, I'll take it. Where would I be meeting him?" Remus asked.

"You'll be meeting him in the same hotel as last night."

Remus looked at Chris for a moment and then nodded. "Of course, what time?"

"He is expecting you around eight o'clock. He didn't specify if he wanted you early." Chris pulled out a paper and handed it to Remus. "I suggest you be there five minutes early."

Remus nodded as he memorized the room number. "Okay."

"You have almost four hours. I want you to go with Alec and Michael to look for something to wear."

Remus was about to nod, when something in the conversation clicked. "Wait. What do you mean go?"

"Shopping." Chris smiled, getting up from his seat and exited the room.

"Shopping!" Remus exclaimed.

He hated shopping and this was going to be worse, as he didn't have to wait for someone. He would be the one trying on the clothes. He groaned.

Three hours and many stores later, Remus returned to his room, depositing all the bags on his bed. He was tired and the last thing he wanted to do was go out. Dragging his feet, he walked to the bathroom and showered as fast as he could. He hadn't left enough time to relax and enjoy the shower as he had hoped. Remus dried and finished preparing for the night ahead. He walked back into his room where, by this time, all the bags had been cleaned up and the clothes put away by one of the house elves. Remus sat on the bed with a sigh and fell back with a groan. He lay there for a few seconds before he rose and moved to the closet.

Remus ended up choosing a grey shirt with black trousers–an elegant outfit, but not over the top–and dressed with a final look in the mirror. He grabbed his phone, his wand and rushed down the stairs. He would be late if he didn't hurry. Remus collided with Chris. Chris stepped back and held Remus by the upper arms to prevent him from falling on his ass.

"Wow! Where's the fire?" Chris joked.

"Sorry. I'm running behind schedule and if I don't hurry, I'll be late for the client."

"Okay, but don't worry. He won't mind. I'll let you know otherwise if the client is particular." Chris smiled and walked away.

Remus moved at a much slower pace out into the waiting car. They arrived again in less than five minutes. Remus waited for Andrew to open the door, and nodded his thanks. He moved into the lobby and walked to the reception area. This time it was a young man behind the desk, and in a few seconds Remus was walking into the elevator and on into the room.

When he stepped inside the room he froze. There, sitting down on one of the chairs by the sliding door, was Severus, coat off and tapping his fingers against the armchair in impatience.

"You're late."

"Umm—"

"Eloquent as always, I see." Severus said mockingly, finally turning to look at him.

"I didn't know you were the client. Chris didn't say anything."

"He wouldn't. He didn't know it was me." Severus moved and walked toward him.

"Why didn't you tell him?"

"I don't think that is any of your business." Severus stopped in front of Remus.

Before Remus could say anything, he was pulled forward and his lips were devoured hungrily. A tongue plunged into his mouth, not asking permission, just taking possession of his mouth and devouring it. Without thought, Remus moved his hands up and around Severus' shoulders, holding on for dear life. Before he could think to breathe, he was pulled by the hair. Panting, Remus looked up into Severus half-lidded smoldering gaze.

"Get on the bed" Severus said, taking off his clothes.

Remus removed his clothes and threw them every which way. Clothes landed all around the room but before he could remove the tie (that had been undone and left on his neck), he was pulled by it close to Severus.

"Se…Snape—"

"Turn around."

Remus turned around, lay down, and waited to see what Severus would do. The next minute he bowed his back when he felt a slick finger penetrate him. Remus didn't even know whether he should moan or groan in pain. The thin line between pain and pleasure was so closely intertwined that he didn't know what he felt.

This time Severus didn't let him get accustomed to his first finger before Severus pulled it back and pushed two fingers inside of Remus, scissoring them with such force that Remus body moved. Remus moaned out loud when the fingers brushed against his prostate stimulating him further. When the fingers pulled out he whined in complaint, but then gave a loud moan as three fingers pushed inside. Remus couldn't wait anymore. His orgasm was right there and he wanted to come.

He gave a shudder and panted, "I can't hold on."

"What's the magic word?" Severus said.

"Please, I need—"Remus didn't know if that was the magic word, but that was all his mind could think.

The rest of his words died on a groan when Severus pulled out his fingers and without waiting, pushed inside. The sex wasn't slow as it had been the first time—not that Remus would have called it slow—but this time it was more desperate, as if Severus wanted to prove something. The question is who he needed to prove something to: himself or Remus. The fingers on Remus' hips tightened in a painful grip as Severus' hips slammed against Remus more forcefully.

Severus whispered on his ear, "Touch yourself."

Remus shook his head. He couldn't touch himself or he would come too quickly. He wanted, needed to enjoy Severus for a few minutes more. Before that thought could completely pass through his mind, Remus impaled himself on Severus cock as Severus took hold of Remus' cock, pumping it in time with his thrusts. With a shout, they both came at the same time with Remus emptying himself in the sheets again and Severus inside of him. Remus lost the fight with his hands and fell onto the bed in exhaustion as Severus slipped out of him.

Remus was waiting for Severus to move from the kneeling position and start dressing, but instead he leaned on the headboard next to Remus and closed his eyes. Could it be that Severus had felt something? Remus wondered as he looked at Severus' profile. He wanted to touch Severus, run his fingers over that face and through the softness of the hair he had felt twice next to his face. More than that, he wanted to look at Severus as he emptied himself inside of Remus. He wanted the see the emotions on Severus' face as ecstasy took over and Severus let go of his inhibitions.

"Severus." Remus whispered. He hadn't wanted to break the moment.

"How many times must I tell you, I haven't given you permission to use my given name." Severus opened his eyes and looked at him "I don't want my name spilling from anyone's mouth, especially not a whore's."

With that, Severus got up and put on his clothing. He moved towards the door and before Severus could exit he threw a pouch. Remus caught it; another pouch the same color and size as the one he had received before, with money inside. How many of these pouches did Sev...no, Snape have anyway?

Remus stayed on the bed. He didn't know if he could continue with this. He loved Severus so much it hurt. But it hurt more when after making love so passionately to Severus who implied there was no emotion there. Remus thought that much passion couldn't be faked. Severus treated him worse than trash. But then, he thought about the moments they were in bed together, and he thought again that he could continue with this. Maybe one day Severus would—Remus closed his fingers in a tight grip around the pouch. Maybe all Remus could ever do was dream and go on for the ride until it ended and be thankful for what little he received.

For the next few weeks, nothing changed. Remus would meet Severus in the same hotel and the desire—as he called it—between them didn't diminish. The sex was incredible–or so Remus thought. But when he lay on the bed with a sweaty and tired Severus at his side, it would start and end the same way. With Severus calling him names and Remus receiving his payment for 'a job well done' a job that stopped being—for him at least—a job. It was so much more when Severus was in his arms.

Every day Remus looked in the mirror and noticed the tired eyes looking back at him. The shine they had gotten after finding a job was diminishing day by day. How much more could, he take? Would he ever find happiness? Or would he forever be an escort, a rent-boy for w at first made him so proud. Now the outfits became something to hate because they became part of a life that Severus always used against him.

Remus stood by the sliding door waiting for it to open behind him and let Severus in. His coat was off and his tie along with it. His hair wasn't as neat as usual. Instead it was disheveled from running his hand through it. Remus was nervous. He had decided to confront Severus this time and to hell with the consequences. He couldn't take the strain anymore.

Each time Remus lay with Severus it was incredible. Whether under Severus or on top, Remus was happy until Severus would revert to name-calling. In that moment Remus could feel part of his heart breaking a little bit more. This time there wasn't anything he could say or do to mend his heart. For while Remus hoped that Severus would see the damage and stop, it never did. The damage to his heart was growing and Remus was afraid it was irreparable. There was a constant ache in his chest these days.

Remus heard the door open and Severus come in, closing the door and pulling off his coat as he always did. He threw his coat over the desk chair and moved towards Remus as he continued disrobing. Every time Remus looked into those midnight eyes, his knees trembled. As Severus continued to walk towards him, Remus moved away from the glass sliding door and slowly walked into Severus arms, smelling Severus' own unique scent, sandalwood.

The last few times they had seen each other, things had changed between them. It wasn't a big change, but it was distinctive. Kisses, hugs, and even a few tender touches had appeared in their repertoire. While before Severus had been rough, now he wasn't exactly gentle, but he wasn't rough either. Remus felt there was a gentleness in their sex that hadn't existed before. Moreover this gentleness confused Remus, because after every time they had sex or was it made love? Severus would go back to treating him with the same revulsion Severus had shown ever since discovering Remus was a werewolf. So why was Severus becoming gentle?

It didn't matter. This time he wouldn't let Severus go without confronting him. Not this time, as Remus couldn't handle the pain he felt afterwards any longer. Whatever they had going on would continue or stop here. Today would be the day Severus would hear him. With that thought, Remus raised his head, took the brutal kiss, gentle after a few seconds, and became more demanding as the heat intensified as it always did.

Severus didn't know until this moment, why when he had first seen Remus sitting on one of the chairs by the sliding door, he had reacted as he had. Maybe Severus had known deep down, and that is why he had treated Remus with such hate and animosity. Severus had started to hate Remus when he intuited that Remus had been part of the plot against him on that fateful night at the Shrieking Shack.

When Severus had found Remus bathed in moonlight and turning into a werewolf in front of him, he had thought that Remus had hated him too. Severus believed that all those times Remus had smiled at Severus and been kind to him had been part of the Marauders' plot against him. That night, while standing terrified, watching Remus turn into a werewolf, Severus felt betrayed by someone—someone who had not even known Severus had come to trust him.

So, when Severus had entered the hotel room and found Remus sitting in a chair by the glass door—Severus did the only thing he knew how to and that was to make Remus pay for that old betrayal. Severus took Remus to bed making him feel like the lowest of the low. When Severus saw Remus lose his inhibitions under Severus' ministrations and start to enjoy the punishing sex, Severus lost control and pulled his fingers out, coating his cock with the smallest amount of oil he could, and slammed into Remus.

Making Remus grunt in pain and not giving him time to adjust, Severus continued punishing him with fast pounding strokes and a painful grip on Remus' hips. However, what happened next Severus hadn't expected. With a moan torn from him, and his cock gripped by Remus' inner walls, Severus emptied inside Remus in one of the strongest orgasms he had ever experienced, just as Remus emptied himself into the sheets beneath him. Severus pulled out of Remus as fast as he could, and without making it too obvious, Severus dressed.

Severus wanted to run out of that room and never look back. But while putting on his coat he realized he had the money inside one of his pockets. He pulled out the small brown pouch and threw it with a parting insult. Severus tried to leave, but Remus had to open his mouth and ruin it for him. He wanted to sputter when he heard the unspoken words of Remus and with as much insult and mockery as he could command, called him the most despicable name of which he could think: whore.

Severus left the room quickly. If any guests who saw him thought he dashed out of the hotel as if the hounds of hell were after him, Severus did not care. He moved out of the lobby and quickly began to take deep, cleansing breaths of the crisp night air, promising himself that Remus had finally paid and this would be the only time Severus would see him.

Of course, Severus found that was easier said than done. For the rest of the day he thought about how Remus moved under him, how good it had felt when Remus took his cock into his mouth. He cursed when he felt the stirring of his prick. He shook his head mentally and turned back to the papers he was grading before the first potion class of the day started.

Another thought floated into his mind from last night and he slammed his quill into his red ink bottle making the bottle move precariously. Severus got up, walked toward the door, and opened it making his students jump at the sudden move. With a sneer towards them, they all moved as fast as they could into their seats. He started his class, and with a final warning the students started work on their potions.

Severus Snape moved around the room inspecting his students' potions. Remus eyes', flavor, and smell, however, were characteristics he couldn't forget as the time passed by. And as his students continued with their potions he thought more about Remus. In fact, the more he thought, the madder he was becoming, and the madder he became, the more points all the houses were losing, even Slytherin.

In his free time, Severus took out a clean parchment and, picking up a quill, he penned a fast note to Chris for a date with Remus. He move his wand over the parchment disguising his writing. He also wrote that, 'Severus' had cleared him. Severus rolled the parchment up and whistled to his black owl, who came through the window in less than a few seconds and perched himself at Severus' desk. Severus attached the note and saw his owl fly out the window.

An hour later, he wanted to curse for having sent the note. Hadn't he said that last night was going to be the only night he would spend with Remus? A few minutes later he couldn't wait for the day to be over so he could go and confront Remus again, maybe make him pay some more.

As night approached and with his duties over, Severus spent an hour preparing in his private rooms. He chose black slacks, a black long-sleeved turtleneck shirt, and sat down. He put on his dress shoes, took the black coat out of the wardrobe and moved out of his room as he put it on. He passed a few of his Slytherins, but they knew better than to ask questions. With a few nods he walked beyond the wards and apparated into the alley closest to the hotel.

Severus walked up to the receptionist and got the key to the room. He wasn't worried about telling Chris which room he got; he knew that once he got the room key, the room number would appear in the note that he sent to Chris. He had wondered how they managed that sometimes, but knew that was part of the secrecy they gave to their clientele. He opened the door to the room, took off his coat, and threw it over the desk chair. He moved to the chairs and sat down to relax while he looked out the doors.

After thirty seconds he became impatient and started to drum his fingers on the chair armrest. He knew that feeling this constant arousal wasn't helping and the longer he waited, the less control he felt over his mind and the little patience he had. When Severus heard the door lock click open he knew he couldn't wait. Severus goaded Remus. When Remus simply stood there and gave him some bullshit about time and Chris, Severus lost it.

He moved with predatory grace towards Remus and before Remus could finish whatever he had been saying, something that by this point Severus didn't care to listen to. He pulled Remus forward and kissed the air out of him. He devoured the mouth underneath his and plunged his tongue when the other one moaned, not giving Remus time to protest or get his bearings. Severus told him to get into the bed; their movements weren't sensual; they were raw. They both disrobed letting their clothes fall wherever.

Once in the bed Severus made Remus turn over and with little patience left, he coated a finger and pushed it inside the pink fluttering ring. The more he saw that ring, the more he wanted to moan, bend down and lick, suck, and bite it until it fluttered and opened like a rare flower. Severus scowled at the thought, pulled his finger out, and pushed another finger in along with the first one, never giving Remus time to adjust and scissoring his fingers in and out.

Severus couldn't hold off long. He pulled his fingers out and with no patience at all he pushed a third finger in besides the other two. When Remus said he wanted more, Severus asked him to plead, thinking that Remus would prefer to bite his lips than to beg. But the man under him pled and moved pinning himself against Severus' fingers. The last of Severus restraint snapped. Coating his cock Severus made one powerful push and sheathed himself inside Remus' willing body, making both of them moan out loud.

He pounded into Remus with such abandon that he made Remus verily hold into the position. As the sounds of flesh hitting flesh were heard around the room, Severus was near and felt his testicles rise. He tensed, knowing that he was close. He ordered Remus to touch himself. Seeing Remus pump his cock with the same rhythm as Severus was using to pound into him, he felt his orgasm's imminence at the same time as Remus' inner muscles contracted around his cock and with a moan both of them let go.

He stayed, trying to take deep breaths and get his body under control as Remus lost the battle and fell into the bed. Severus stayed for a few seconds more kneeling and then moved next to Remus and relaxed against the headboard. Of course, like everything else, this couldn't last and when Remus uttered his name, he lost it. He hated when Remus said his name; he felt the hurt and hate become so big that he felt as if he were choking. He told Remus what he thought about the use of his name, got up from the bed, put on his clothes, and pulling the payment from his inner pocket he threw it at Remus and walked out of the room.

Severus tried not to see Remus, but he couldn't stop himself. For the next few weeks they would meet in the same hotel. He noticed a change in Remus, but he didn't know or maybe he didn't want to find out what caused the change. Severus noticed the little touches; a kiss behind his ear and a lick on a nipple making him moan and writhe under him. Severus also noticed that more and more he cared that Remus would have his orgasm before he did.

Severus didn't understand, but what he knew, was that after the feeling of fulfillment wore off, he would treat Remus the same awful way. He took notice of the small shine in Remus' eyes that he got whenever Severus would do something to him. But the shine would be extinguished like a candle being blown out when Severus' sharp tongue would do its damage. What Severus couldn't understand is why Remus would come back time after time to meet him.

Severus entered the room and saw Remus near the glass door. Once he closed the door he removed his coat and opened his arms as he been doing lately—another thing that had changed between them. Remus moved into his embrace; he felt so warm and smelled wonderful, but before Severus let his mind wonder, he pulled Remus' head back and devoured his mouth, plunging his tongue into Remus' mouth, finding and savoring his flavor. A flavor that Severus was starting to think that he wouldn't be able to live without.

Severus was afraid of what was developing between them. He was even afraid of looking into it. He moved the two of them onto the bed and removed Remus' clothes slowly and kissed the skin being exposed as it came into his view. A shoulder, the collar bone, and as the shirt slipped down his arms he caressed those, as he didn't want to stop kissing Remus' neck; that had become a place he was finding more addictive the more he kissed it.

He brought his lips back to Remus' lips and kissed him. As he let go, he bit the bottom lip and pulled it a little bit with his teeth, letting it go and moving his lips again to Remus' neck. This time their foreplay felt different. It was as if both of them were searching for something but didn't know what that something might be. As if they knew that something was going to change tonight for better or worse. It was something that Severus knew needed to happened whether they wanted it or not.

Severus didn't know if he actually wanted to change anything. He was fine with how things were between them. He kissed downwards and took a nipple into his mouth while his hand played with the other, pebble twisting it between his fingers and plucking it so it would stand up. He moved to the other nipple and sucked it slowly into his mouth after the treatment it had gotten from his fingers. Remus moved under him, bringing their still clothed cocks together to rub them, making both of them gasp.

Severus finished removing the rest of Remus' clothes as Remus did the same with Severus' clothes. They moved again bringing their now naked cocks together. Remus hooked a leg over Severus' waist, bringing them closer together. No matter how fast Severus wanted to go, he for the first time—since being with Remus—went slowly.

He kissed Remus' body stopping at the points that made Remus moan more and giving them special attention as he moved down. When he reached Remus' feet, he took one foot and kissed the sole, instep, and his heel, moving up and slowly kissing behind his knee, again moving upwards as he kissed the inside of his leg bringing him closer to Remus' leaking cock. He licked the slit, tasting the pre-cum that was already covering the head. He swirled his tongue over the head and then, without giving Remus any warning he took the cock into his mouth.

Remus bucked under him, nearly making him choke when the cock was pushed forward hitting the back of his throat. Severus wondered how Remus had done it before without choking. He bobbed his head for a few seconds and then with a pop let go of the cock letting it hit Remus stomach. Severus got onto his knees and reached behind for the oil. He opened the oil and covered a finger. Throwing the oil onto the bed next to Remus, he moved his hand, and while looking into Remus' eyes, he inserted a finger slowly letting Remus get accustomed to the feeling, for the first time. Gently, he moved his finger.

He hooked his finger trying to find Remus' prostrate and smirking when he heard Remus moan and arch his back. Severus took a few seconds more, and pulling the finger almost all the way out, he inserted a second finger. He still was looking, noticing the little changes that until now he had missed: like how Remus would scrunch his nose in discomfort and then the widening of his eyes when Severus hit the prostrate, and then the fluttering of eyes, finally closing in ecstasy.

Severus was enjoying the many changes of expression that fluttered across Remus' face, but he couldn't take any more. He wanted to bury himself in Remus' body. He pulled his fingers out and inserted a third, but this time he went a little faster, scissoring his fingers faster, stretching and loosening the muscles. He stopped and took the oil and poured a little bit into his hand and slicked his cock. Pulling his fingers out he aligned his cock and pushed in slowly. He looked down. Seeing the expression on Remus' face, he couldn't resist and kissed Remus as he entered him and moaned into his mouth.

The sex was gentle as they moved together. He didn't pound, he moved slowly, bringing them closer to their release. All this time, as they moved in synchrony their hands weren't still. They caressed any the skin they could reach with their hands. Remus' legs went around Severus' waist and pulled him forward as he rocked his hips. When Severus felt his testicles rise up, he moved a hand between their bodies and took hold of Remus' cock, stroking it a few times as he angled his hips to hit Remus' prostrate and he pounded faster. He moaned when Remus inner muscles contracted against him as they both came at the same time.

Severus fell on top of Remus making Remus grunt at the weight, and stayed there as his heart and breathing regulated. He felt relaxed and happy as Remus carded his hand through Severus' hair and he closed his eyes as he relax in Remus' arms. However, in the next instant his eyes flew open when he heard Remus.

"What did you say?" Severus said as he pulled back and looked at Remus.

"I love you." Remus whispered.

Severus moved away from Remus so fast it was as if he had been burned. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. Why was it that every time that he felt they were coming to an understanding, Remus would open his mouth and mess everything up? He bent down and started to pick up his clothes and get dressed. He needed to get out of here. He should never have come back all those times, he should have never have come, period.

He froze when Remus touched his arm and then pulled away. "Don't touch me" he snarled.

Severus needed to go. Where were his shoes? He looked around, but he couldn't see them. He felt his heart pounding faster and faster. He needed to get out of there. He finally saw his shoes by the foot of the bed and was about to sit down on the bed to put them on, but thought better of it. He hopped on one foot put one on and then the other as he put on his shoes.

"Severus, stop. Please." Remus said pleading.

"What?" Severus snapped, but didn't look towards Remus; he couldn't.

Wand. Where was his wand? He looked inside his coat pocket and found it along with the pouch money. He pulled it out and threw it at Remus. But this time Remus didn't catch it. Remus let the money pouch drop to the floor. Severus stared as the pouch fell and the money spilled out, the coins catching the light of the lamp and glittering.

"I don't want your money. Like I said before, I love you. I want us to do this right," Severus saw Remus nearing him, "I know you feel something for me—"

"Just. Don't." Severus said coldly, cutting him off, and backing away.

"I love you Severus." Remus' voice broke.

Severus looked at Remus, with the sheet around his waist. He opened his arms and waited until Remus walked up to him and felt the body tremble and melt against him. He closed his arms around Remus and bent his head until his lips touched Remus' ear and said:

"I would never feel anything for you but contempt. Get it through your head Lupin: everything we did was no more than a patron paying for his favorite whore. That is what you will always be for me, a whore."

Severus pulled back and walked out of the room, not looking back.

Remus stood there watching the door close behind Severus. Well, he had found his answer, hadn't he? Now he knew that he couldn't change anything. At least not between the two of them He moved about the room picking up the scattered clothes and putting them on. He left the hotel, not bothering picking up the money that was still lying on the floor.

Once at the mansion, Remus walked to his room. He had just closed the door when there was a knock. He called for whomever to enter. He already knew who it would be. He had noticed them when he had come in. He had noticed how they had stared at Remus. He remained sitting as Chris and Michael came into the room and closed the door behind them. They moved and sat down next to him on the bed.

"Remus, what happened?" Chris questioned.

"You have been seeing him, haven't you?" Michael asked at the same time.

"Yes. I have." Remus said silently.

"Who?" Chris asked turning to Michael.

"The Scholar."

"Remus, you haven't been seeing 'The Scholar' all this time. I would know. I make your appointments." Chris said perplexed.

"He's been sending you mail by owl and making you believe it was someone else." Remus said quietly.

"That son of a bitch!" Chris said, getting up and walking back and forth, "If you knew, why did you continue? Why didn't you tell me?"

Remus looked at Chris. He could see Chris was mad, and Michael wasn't far behind. "Because, I love him." he murmured.

"Did you know him? Or was this the first time—"

"I have known him since we were eleven years old." Remus got up and moved to look outside the window. "And I have loved him since then."

Chris made a noise of incredulity. "Did you tell him how you felt? Was that the reason he continued seeing you?"

Remus turned away from the window and lean against the panel, looking at Chris, "No, he never knew until now. I thought he felt something for me, but all he ever felt was contempt."

Michael moved towards him, "What happened? I want to know everything."

Quietly Remus started telling them everything. How when they were in school he would always smile at the quiet Slytherin and he would sometimes get a small smile back. How he had one day approached Severus with a 'hello' and the small 'hello' he had received in return. Remus told them about the prank Sirius had played on Severus, and how Severus had seen him turn into a werewolf. He told them how after that, every single time he had reached out to the Slytherin, he would only get a sneer and be called a monster.

He told Chris and Michael how he continued trying to make amends to Severus after they left school. As they grew older, still he received only sneers in return for trying. Remus told them how he had felt when Severus had been the one to come through the door that first time at the hotel. How, even though Severus had treated him badly, he had known it was better than nothing at all; how things had changed between them, how he had actually thought Severus felt something in return. And how, tonight, he had found out otherwise.

"Why would you go through that?" Michael said quietly.

"Because, I actually thought I could love enough for both of us" he said with a sigh and sat down tiredly on the bed, "I found out otherwise."

They stayed quiet for a few minutes, until there was another knock at the door. Chris called for whoever was at the door to enter. Alec opened the door and only his head could be seen.

"Hey boss, the hotel call and said that one of our guys forgot money and—" Alec words trailed off as he felt the tense atmosphere.

"Thank you, Alec. Could you please tell Andrew to pick it up?" Chris said quietly.

"Umm, sure." Alec said pulling his head out and closing the door.

"What do you want to do?" Chris asked, breaking the silence after Alec's departure.

"I'm going to leave. I can't do this, not with someone else." Remus said not looking up as he nervously plucked a thread on the duvet.

Michael touched his shoulder, making him look up, "This work isn't for everyone, Remus; especially not someone with a big heart like yours."

"Michael is right, Remus. I kind of saw this coming. Not you falling in love, mind you." Chris said sheepishly, making them laugh and lightening the mood. "However, since the first time I saw you, I knew this job wasn't for you."

"Then why—"

"Why did I offer you a job?" Chris asked, encompassing with a swipe of his hand what they were.

Remus nodded.

"You were the one that needed to decide for yourself, not I." Chris answered, "It was your decision to make. Like I told you the first time, you can stay here for as long as you wish."

"Thank you, but I can't. I need to move on and forget."

"Where will you be going" Michael asked.

"I'm going to the only place I always felt free to be me." Remus said, getting up from the bed, "The only place where some dreams were broken and others made."

"You're leaving now?" Chris asked perplexed.

"Yes. I'm only taking what I came here with, nothing else." Remus said.

"No, you won't. You'll take all that we have bought you." Chris stated.

"But, I—"

"No but's, Remus. All this is yours." Michael said, butting in.

"Thank you so much for your help." Remus said.

Michael left the room, brought in a suitcase, and put it on the bed, "Here, you'll need something for your clothes."

"Okay, now enough of this sadness. Let's help Remus pack and then we dine together one last time."

Chris and Michael helped Remus fold his clothes and put them in the suitcase. Once done, Remus shrunk the suitcase and put it inside his coat pocket. It was a quiet group which made its way downstairs and into the dining room. However, as Remus stepped into the dining room, he gasped and received hugs from all the people living in the house with 'goodbyes' and 'I will miss you's.' He felt moisture gathering in his eyes and tried to blink the tears away.

Remus couldn't believe they had gone through all this just for him. He wondered when it was that they had discovered he was leaving. The room was decorated with balloons, strings hanging around the room, and a banner with a 'Goodbye, Remus Lupin' hanging on the far wall.

"I... Thank you so much for everything." He said swallowing the tight knot.

Michael put an arm over his shoulders, "You're welcome, Remus. This is to show you that you'll be missed and you will forever have a home with us."

Alec got up on top of a chair, "Okay, now it's time to play 'Pin the tail on the ass!"

Remus shook his head. When Marley said aloud that they should all get in line to pin it on Alec, as he was the ass of the house, he got cheers and catcalls from the rest of the people. Remus looked at the people that a few months ago he hadn't even known. Now he felt as if he had known them all his life.

There was shy Cori who everyone took care of, and who he later found out—by Cory himself—had a huge crush on Alec. Remus couldn't see those two together, but then again, they did say that opposites attract. He looked at Marley, the pixie woman who had surprised him so much. He would never have believed the powerful punch that small body carried. He had learned once when he had been training karate with her.

Then he saw Andrew, who loved cars more than he did himself. But those cars sure could run. He looked to his left and noticed Chris talking with Alejandro. Those two had been a surprise. Remus had found them in a very compromising position over the desk once when he had entered Chris' office without knocking. It was incredible how much he knew about each of them. Another example was Elizabeth, better known as Liz who was afraid of spiders, even the smallest ones.

He would definitely miss everyone. The laughter, the fights, and especially the crazy moments that each of them had. He stayed behind, watched them for a few more seconds as he memorized their faces and voices and with a mental farewell, he left the party quietly and left the mansion closing the door behind him for the last time.

To say that his life was better after he walked out of that room, would be a lie, and one thing Severus didn't do was lie. All his life he had lied. First he lied to Lily when she had been his only friend, and then to the Dark Lord to be able to live beyond the war. However, after the war ended, he promised himself that he wouldn't lie to anyone, no matter what, but specially not to himself. He had been tired of lying, and tired of living a lie. However, he wasn't going to scream the truth from the top of the roof no matter what. He was a very private person.

He still wondered why he had lied to himself that night, why he had lied to Remus. Yes, he knew why. He had lied because for the first time in his life he was afraid. For the first time, he was afraid that he could move on and, could he say it, love? He had come to that conclusion after he had left Remus. That night he had arrived back at his quarters and walked up to his liquor cabinet and poured himself a scotch and drunk it in one gulp. When he felt that he was under control, he had discarded his coat, sat down in front of the fire, and contemplated everything from that beginning.

At first he was reluctant to actually go deeper and think honestly about the whole thing. Yet, the more he thought, he realized that he knew deep down—and now could actually accept—that he had always felt something for Remus. When he had been younger, he had felt content knowing that someone besides Lily wanted to get to know him. He thought about that fateful night and for the first time he could see it from a different perspective. He could clearly see Remus' eyes. Remus hadn't looked pleased with himself, he looked scared. Severus knew now that Remus had been afraid for him and by the shock on his face, he knew that Remus wasn't expecting Severus to be there that night.

With a curse he got up and started pacing his living room. What would he do now? What could he do now? For the past month, he had treated Remus with the utmost contempt and done his best to make him feel like the lowest of the low. Now he had to find a way to get Remus to hear him out and he was afraid of the reception that Remus would give him when he saw him. He had played with Remus' feelings and still he felt the venom that had poured out of his mouth without thought of the consequences.

There was only one place where he could go to look for Remus. Tonight he would go after class was done; he would go search for Remus and ask for time to explain. Severus pulled himself away from his musings and stalked out of his private rooms and into his classroom full of seventh years. He moved around the classroom and flicked his wand towards the board where that day's lessons were being written. He looked around and saw that all the students were grabbing ingredients. Others were ready with fires under their cauldrons. With a last look around the classroom, he moved to sit at his desk.

For the rest of the day and in between classes Severus corrected some of yesterday's and today's homework assignments. His time didn't go quickly, but it didn't matter. The time gave Severus the opportunity to think about what he would say to Remus when he saw him. Of course, there was a possibility that he would get the door slammed shut in his face. At least that was the worst that could happen, right?

Okay, he wasn't expecting this, Severus thought as he cradled his throbbing cheek in his hand from the punch that Chris had laid out on him when he had uttered Remus' name. The only reason Chris hadn't continued punching him was that another guy in the house was holding Chris back and a 3rd guy was helping Severus up from the floor. Severus pulled out his wand and flicking it over his cheek, felt the throbbing lessen.

"Like I said before being rudely interrupted, I would like to speak to Remus" Severus sneered.

Severus took a step back and pointed his wand at Chris when he pulled out of the grasp of the guy holding him and moved towards Severus again. Again, Chris was held back, but this time by a hand on his shoulder by Michael—a guy Severus had met before.

"Enough, Chris. Why, Severus?" Michael stared at him quietly, "Why do you want to speak to Remus?"

"Sorry, but I do not think that is any of your business, Michael."

"It is if you wish to speak to him." Michael insisted.

Severus glared at Michael who just stood there and calmly stared back. "What do you know?" Severus said finally, relenting after accepting what he saw in Michael's eyes.

"Everything. Andrew and Alec, I will take it from here. You guys can go. Chris, Severus, to the office. Now."

Severus followed behind Michael as Michael pushed Chris in front of him and steered them to the office. Once inside, the other two sat down, one behind the desk and the other on the couch by the window, while Severus stood between them both. He didn't want to give them more chances to make him feel inferior than they already had.

"Now tell us. Why do you want to speak to Remus?" Michael insisted. "Before you say anything, be warned that whatever you said must be the truth because it all depends on us for you to find Remus."

"Wait, find him? What do you mean? He's not here?" Severus asked one question after another.

As he looked between them, Severus noticed Michael exchange looks with Chris and then turn back to him.

"Remus left the same day he came back from seeing you" Chris said, still glaring.

Michael continued talking over Chris. "The day he came from seeing you, we talked to him, and to say that he wasn't happy is an understatement. You, Mr. Know-it-all, sure can be clueless when it comes to love."

"So, now you tell us everything if you wish to see him again" Chris sneered.

Severus looked at both of them and started pacing the office. He felt crowded and over-exposed, but there wasn't anything he could do. He needed to find Remus. He told them everything, to a point, but to save some of his dignity, he didn't tell them about how his hatred towards Remus started, or the things he made Remus do while they were together at the hotel. However, he noticed that it didn't matter if he told them or not. He could tell just by looking at them that Remus had already told them everything. He finished and stopped pacing. He looked at them, waiting with his shoulders tense, waiting for them to laugh at him. No matter how many years passed he couldn't stop thinking that others would be like James and Sirius.

"Thank you, Severus. However, I do have one more question?" Michael said.

Severus felt himself tense up.

"Do you love him?" Michael said quietly.

Severus opened his mouth to tell them that wasn't any of their business, to tell them 'no,' he didn't love Remus. However, the words halted and he thought about it again. Yes, he had thought about all the stuff he had done to Remus and what he had thought Remus had done to him. But in all his musings, he never thought of whether he could be in love with Remus.

He stood there frozen on the spot with his eyes staring at nothing while he thought about their last night together. He had never thought about that question. Could this really be love? He started laughing. How could he be so dumb? He could actually answer this question now. Yes, he was in love with the wolf. Now he could completely accept why that night the sex with Remus had been so gentle. It wasn't just sex; they had made love.

"Yes." Severus said. They didn't need more, because with that simple answer he had conveyed everything he felt. Love.

"What do you think, Chris? Should we tell him where Remus is?" Michael asked turning to Chris.

Chris still looked at Severus, "No."

"Why you—" Severus started.

"Enough! You must understand this is for Remus, not for you." Michael said exasperated, and turned from Chris to Severus, "And we don't know where Remus is."

"What? What do you mean, you don't know?" Severus cursed under his breath as he started pacing again.

"All we know is one phrase he said before he left." Michael said, "I think that would be a clue to you."

"Well?"

"He said and I quote 'I'm going to the only place, I always felt free to be me. The place where dreams were broken and others made.' That's all he said, and in the middle of the party he left." Michael finished.

Severus thought over the phrase, but could think of many places that would fit Remus' phrase. There was Hogwarts, a place that anyone who needed a home would feel as if they had found one. However, Remus had his family and he was loved. So it couldn't be Hogwarts, but Hogwarts could fit into the second part of the sentence as it was a place where dreams were made while others were broken. No, it must be a place that fit both descriptions and Hogwarts was out.

Of course, that left the mongrel's house, Grimmauld Place. Remus always had a home there during the war and some dreams came true whereas others didn't. But no, Remus was always sad—not that Severus noticed. He gave a mental sigh; he must stop doing that. If he wanted Remus back, he must stop trying to belittle what he felt for Remus, even back then. Nevertheless, Grimmauld Place couldn't be it, as one thing that both of them knew was that Remus could never be his true self, and Remus' true self was accepting the wolf as part of him.

Severus stopped pacing suddenly, almost crashing into a table. He now knew where Remus might be. It was a long shot, but it was the only other place Severus could think of. He looked at Michael and then at Chris, and left with a smile on his face. He didn't care that he had left them behind asking 'where are going.' He didn't care if he was making a spectacle of himself as he ran out and apparated. He had a wolf to find and convince.

Severus arrived outside Hogwarts anti-apparition wards, walked up to the Whomping Willow tree, and with an Immobulus froze the willow's deathly branches. He moved quietly under the root of the tree and into the secret passage. With a Lumos he walked down the dark passage until he arrived at the dilapidated building that was the Shrieking Shack. He moved up the stairs quietly, trying not to step too hard on the rickety, moldy stairs. He knew that the only reason this thing was still serviceable was all the magic holding it together. Severus was about to whack a big spider web hanging in front of him, but thought better of it when he saw the huge spider crawling on it. With a flick of his wand he vanished the spider and web.

Severus kept going upstairs until he reached the room. He quietly turned the knob to the old door and entered the room. Severus blinked in surprise when he saw the room clean and orderly. The last time he had been here, he had been thrown across the room by Potter and into the bed that had collapsed on top of him. Now the bed stood in the same space, but instead of moldy wood and infested curtains and bed linens stood a majestic and classic four poster bed with clean curtains and linens. As he looked around he noticed other little things. He noticed the couch clean and free of dust, the floor clean and sparkling.

The only thing that looked like what it appeared to be outside, a depilated building were the ceiling and walls. The ceiling was stained an old gray color and he could see a few holes here and there, the walls had wallpaper that was peeling from places. The room smelled better than the last time, but still had the smell of an old, closed-up house.

Severus was looking around at the other mismatched furniture when he heard the door open behind him. He turned and saw Remus stare at him as he let go of the paper food bag he had been holding. The food spilled out of the bag, with a few oranges rolling under the furniture around the room.

"What are you doing here? How did you find me?" Remus said.

Severus stood there for a little while looking at Remus. It was incredible how differently Remus appeared, now that he accepted how he felt instead of denying it.

"I came to talk to you. As for how I found you, I followed the clue."

Remus looked perplexed saying, "What clue?"

"The comment about where you where going that you made to Chris and Michael." Severus said matter of fact.

"What comment?"

"I quote, 'I'm going to the only place I always felt free to be me. The place where dreams were broken and others made'" Severus said.

Severus stood there trying not to squirm as Remus stared at him. He wanted to tell Remus not to say anything, but then what would Remus say? However, what came out wasn't anything that Severus would have expected from Remus.

"Why have you come?"

Severus thought that Remus would have asked many other questions, but never in a thousand years would he have thought that Remus would have asked that question. He didn't know how to answer. He opened his mouth and then closed it, and Merlin help him, he squirmed. He looked at Remus and noticed the small smile playing on his lips. All tension left his body and he knew then that the easiest way to answer the question wasn't by being his methodical, sarcastic self. It was by being sincere to the only person besides Lily that he loved.

He took a deep breath, but he didn't give the speech that he had planned out nor answer why he was there. What he said was the simplest and oldest sentence in the universe and the most understood among all races.

"I love you."

He let go the breath he hadn't known he had been holding in a whoosh and waited as Remus stood there and blinked at him. Nothing else. Remus just blinked. Severus wanted to go over there and grab Remus by his upper arms and shake him and tell him to say something, anything, or everything.

However, Remus stood there blinking and then laughed. Severus couldn't understand what was going on. He had bared his heart—something so out of character for him—and now he was being laughed at. He had always hated when anyone laughed at him. He had hated it since he had been in Hogwarts. He moved and walked towards the door. He should never have come. Now he knew this had been a big mistake. He touched the door and was about to open it when he felt a hand on his arm.

"Don't go. I'm sorry." Remus said.

Severus pulled his arm from the touch, "I should never have come. I see that everything to you was a big joke. You're the same as Potter and Black."

"I wasn't laughing at what you said," Remus looked about to laugh, "I was laughing at how you look."

He moved away from Remus again intending to leave, but Remus pulled him towards a mirror that he hadn't seen in the other side of the room. He stood there, but didn't see anything out of the ordinary, until he looked closely at his hair. There, nestled upon his hair was the same spider that he had tried to vanish previously. He looked ridiculous and he couldn't hold back. He started laughing as Remus removed the spider and put it on the ground.

"As for what you said," Remus continued, "I love you, too."

Severus opened his mouth. He wanted to hug Remus to him and asked for forgiveness for everything he ever done and for everything he had said, but when he opened his mouth Remus placed a finger on his lips.

"Don't say anything. We both made mistakes and I want us to start anew together."

"Remus—"

"Don't Severus. We have wasted half of our lives fighting. Now let's celebrate the rest of it together."

Severus pulled Remus gently to him and leaned down to capture his lips. First he nipped and then, like a starving man, devoured Remus mouth. He gently nipped Remus' bottom lip as he pulled away.

"I wont let you go, Remus, so think carefully if this is what you want." Severus said. "I will be a right bastard sometimes and a pain in the arse other times, and most likely a possessive jealous lover. Do you still want me?"

"I wouldn't have you any other way Severus."

Severus pulled Remus flush against his body and kissed him. Picking Remus up and making Remus wrap his feet around his waist, he walked towards the bed and deposited Remus in the middle of it. Severus leaned over him and kissed him hungrily as he started to remove Remus clothes with one hand. As he had said to Remus before, he would never let him go and this night would be one of many nights to come where he would make love to his friend, lover, and if Severus had anything to say about it, his husband.

◄The End►

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